6 days off work and 4 of them travelling

The title says it all but then doesn’t it always? Um..no!

Having my first real break from work since starting my new job back in…July was it? And I need it! Just wish I wasn’t having to spend four days of it getting to and from places. Still, for two of those days I will either, hopefully, be heading towards the love of my life or in her company heading back to mine, so it’s not as bad as it may seem. It’s going to be so good to kind of let go on Christmas Eve when I get there and just let the troubles of the world lose themselves on the winding country roads heading off into the cold, cold night, while I stay warm and cosy with my girl.

It’s my first Christmas sans family, which will be weird I guess but that’s not to say it wont be wonderfabulous too. Think my parents will be okay without me. That’s not to sound like I’m the be all and end all of Christmas but you know what parents are like, right? Still, they have a houseful where they are, so I don’t think I will be missed for more than ten minutes before the screaming of the kids begins just after 5am!  Anyway, they are the remaining two other days of travel that the heading up there spoke about, so don’t fret about them!

So, this is Christmas and what have you done…well, John, I’ve got myself a new job, fallen head over heels in love and had my brain awoken to numerous possibilities that the future may hold…will hold. Not bad is it. How about you?

Peace, love and general good wishes to you all…I say all…I mean those that are unlucky enough to have stumbled here while searching for either Lennon lyrics or because they have read the rest of the internet.

Be good girls n boys and Santa may come a calling.

Weekends…the edit

What are weekends? What are they for? Breaks from the working week? From busy lives?

To me, of late, they are everything. Be they spent busily rushing around or doing next to nothing it doesn’t matter to me. With a million people rushing by in a frenzied whirl or alone it doesn’t matter to me. Seeing friends and socialising or sleeping until noon it doesn’t matter to me.

It doesn’t matter to me so long as I am with you. Equally happy whispering daft song lyrics to you while you sing beautifully and with gusto, or rushing to the shops to not buy the things that we want, or cooking you dinner while you enjoy your post massage snuggle, or (edited for common decency! lol), or playing pool and chatting up random old men. It doesn’t matter to me. Be I in this country or be I in yours, it doesn’t matter to me. Whether I am travelling across country or awaiting by the fire for your arrival, it doesn’t matter to me.

All that matters to me about them now, and every other day, is that I get to spend them with you. My life has changed in so many ways but none that are probably perceptible to anyone else but me. I no longer wish for how I used to spend them before.

But then the weekend…ends. I look around and see the state of the kitchen and it’s washing up yet to be done piled up high. The clothes on the sofa and the **** in the lounge. The duvet a tumble of **** and ****, the tossed aside ****. I see myself in the mirror with unwashed hair and looking a state and……..I…….smile. I smile because I spent the weekend with you doing whatever we wanted to. I smile because I think back to everything we shared and how you smiled and laughed and teased and joked and looked so very happy.

Weekends are for love. Weekends are for you. But now I have to work out how to make the weekends become days of the week too.

Scum

Fucking lowlife fucking scum who steal from my girlfriend’s car. That’s all they are…scum.

I wanted to give her a lovely weekend break away from her busy work and home life and some one, or bodies, decide to literally prise open her car and steal her bag from within containing things of value, things of no value but to her heart (which surely must have broken a little at least) and things that are just a pain to get stopped, or anew or replaced.To them it was just a “nothing” crime…a means to an end but for her it was so much more.

Guilt is what I feel most of all. Guilt for it happening while she was down here to see me. Guilt for living in what is a nice quiet place mostly but seems to be getting ever more surrounded by the scum of the earth. The drug dealing, jobless, chav, fucking scum. It’s not often I get angry these days but I am about this and what’s worse still is that there is nothing I can do about it.

Hope you are feeling all right about it tonight darling. Wish you didn’t have to leave, so I could keep you wrapped safely in my arms for evermore. It wont happen again.

Apologies

I  am so, so very, very sorry. Who’d have thought that when I landed on this new venue for my blog that the majority of them would be happy…about love even! But I guess that is where my head is right now. Anyone who may have known me on Yahoo must be wondering what the heck has happened to me. Well, J has happened to me and happened to me in ways that surprise and delight even me.

So, J. That’s all you are getting for now wondering readers although she deserves a proper revelation at some point…in big gold sparkly letters…and spotlights…and a standing ovation…with a bouquet. Okay, so maybe some of you might be feeling a little queasy with how I am expressing myself lately but A) I don’t care and B) I can’t help it and C) See A).

I was going to write a lot more but once again my thoughts can not remain focused on the idea I had. My mind is drifting to the highways and byways where a certain lovely someone is currently driving a long way through the dark to her home. I just wish that I could have been there waiting for her to snaffle her all up and show her just what she means to me rather than with words that fail to do justice to even a zillionth of my feelings. But, alas, I cannot. So hopefully, when she reads this, a smile will creep across her face.

Am I right sweetheart?

I’ve got a girlfriend…I’ve got a girlfriend!…I’ve got a girlfriend!!!

The title isn’t a boast…just the thought that crossed my mind right now and spread like the smile across my face.

Ain’t life strange? Yes it is, is the answer you are looking for. Somebody new comes in to your life and suddenly all the troubles in the world that you may have had just lift themselves off your shoulders and disappear in to the night. Of course new problems arise like how the heck can you get to see this new person more often but then they aren’t really problems are they? No, is the answer you are looking for. There are just teeny weeny obstacles to overcome. Much as a toddler might find that sticklebricks hinder their path to new delights until they discover that they can just crawl straight over them or put them in their mouth for safe-keeping. The path to love is not arduous but merely sticklebricked now and then.

A friend of mine said that they had never seen me looking so relaxed as they did yesterday. I wasn’t aware of any great change in my manner or attitude but I guess it’s there on show for everyone else to see. I know that internally I feel…peaceful…happy…smiley…silly…love. How can somebody consume so much of your attention when they are not around?

Barely a minute goes by without my mind wandering to what she is doing, where she is, is she happy, does she miss me. I have to fight the urge to text her every few minutes telling her how I feel about her. Wishing she was here and not there. Curled in my arms and not being jostled around busy streets. Warm and content, not cold and stressed by people.

I thought of having a snoozy morning snuggled up in bed but then I didn’t have her to snuggle up with, waffle inanely to, or just hold tenderly, so instead I went for a walk in the cold crystallised air and smiled at everyone I passed, said good morning to the men delivering early supplies to the shops and gazed at a very chilled cat who looked at me like he knew what I was feeling. Like he knew I was in love…and head over heels in love too.

The sunlight looks clearer today…more pristine…sharper. Maybe it’s just my eyes that are seeing things anew lately.